So much to say but the words can’t form. So many thoughts but no actions come. So many feelings and no release. You ask me my thoughts but you don’t listen, you never truly listen. You don’t want to hear my thoughts. Yeah, they might be about you but they aren’t good thoughts. You would probably actually be shocked at what I really do think of you. It amazes me too. Your like a bad train wreck derailing, you know you need to get away from it and you know you don’t need to watch it but you do anyway. Your drawn in, not by the good but your sucked in by the bad. So the million dollar question… Why stick around? Why stay? I have no clue. A friend of yours asked me how long we had been together. I reply over a year and a half on and off. He says on and off? Yeah! He says well he’s lucky to have you, you’re a beautiful girl! Beauty only gets you so far and luck doesn’t mean a thing if he never tells you he appreciates you. If anything Ive figured out you cant change what hurts you, change you so it doesn’t hurt you anymore.
What hurts me?
I want someone that is genuine.
I want someone that really does care for me.
I want someone that isn’t selfish.
I want someone that loves the Lord.
I want someone that wants to commit to me.
I want someone that I can trust.
I want someone that makes me want to be a better person.
I want someone that appreciates me.
I want someone that I don’t have to prove anything to.
I want someone that will communicate with me.
So instead of trying to change someone into something he isn’t and get my feelings hurt for him being the opposite of what I want, I need to BE and find someone like I want them.
-To find someone genuine I need to be genuine. Not only with people but with myself. If something isn’t right in my relationships I need to fix it instead of wait it out. Lord help me to be a genuine person not only in relationships but with everyone I come in contact with.
-To have someone that cares for me I need to show others that I care for them. You get back what you put out in the world. I feel like I have a lot to offer the world so I guess I need to just start giving and if all people want to do around me is take take take then that is fine. I rather be a giver than a taker. Lord give me your eyes to see people with and grant me a heart full of love and care, so much care that it spills out onto anyone I come in contact with so that I may be cared for and loved too.
-To want to be with someone that is selfless you need to be more selfless yourself. Think of others. Make time for friends; listen, care, and remember what they say. Serve others. Lord help me to be selfless and think of others. I in turn pray for friends that are selfless and Christian friends that genuinely care for me as well.
-To find someone that loves and serves the Lord you need to serve the Lord 100 percent. Lord I pray for my future husband lord, protect him and keep him safe, guide and direct him so that in your time our paths will meet.
-To find someone that wants to commit to me I need to be worthy of being committed to. Get things right in my life. Figure out what I truly want and what I want out of life. Lord I pray for the person you have for me. I pray Lord that I am a worthy women to be commited to. Show me what I need to change Lord so that I can be worthy of commiting to and find the one that wants to commit to me.
-To find someone that I can trust I need to be trustworthy. Can someone that dates me trust me? Its time to quite playing games. Trust until they give you a reason not to trust anymore. If your trusting them and having issues believing them believe them until you find out otherwise. If you find out otherwise then its not your fault they cheated when you shouldn’t have trusted them. It’s life, it happens. Forgive and forget and move on. Find someone better. Lord help me to be trustworthy and not only to be worthy of trust but to have peace in trusting others.
-To find someone that inspires me to be a better person I need to inspire others to want to strive better and reach higher. Be an encourager, be opptomistic, speak positivity into their lives. Lord I pray for inspiration, I pray for positivity so that I can speak it over others lives.
-To find someone that appreciates me I need to appreciate others more and tell them. You get what you give. Lord help me to be a better person by being able to show others that I care for them and appreciate them. I pray for insecurity walls to fall.
-To find someone that approves of me and I feel comfortable around I need to make sure others feel comfortable around me and show them I approve…unless its something I don’t agree or approve of lol
-To find someone that will communicate with me I need to open up and be willing to communicate and be open.
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